I don’t care if you are sorry, I’ll never forgive you! Have you experienced unforgiveness, or are you not willing to forgive?
What causes people not to forgive or accept an apology? Someone caused you pain, and they need to suffer as much as you. They need to pay for what they’ve done; somebody needs to pay! So you cut them off trying to inflict the most misery possible. Now, you tell others what’s happened to you. People need to know what a disgusting human being that person is. You make vows of letting no one close enough to hurt you again. But the more you think it over, and the more you talk to others, makes the anger grow.
The problem with hanging on to bitterness is you are the one that’s suffering. No one changes what the perpetrator did, nor improve the results, or the person. The decision belongs to you. Either continue to ruminate and allow the wound to fester and get worse, or realize the road you are on leads to nowhere, and do something constructive. You might think forgiveness is:
1. Condoning what the offender did to you.
2, Giving in to injustice.
3, Turning the other cheek.
4. Pretend it’s not that significant.
5. Thinking you’re not entitled to be angry.
6. Forcing yourself to associate with someone who might hurt you again.
This negative way of thinking makes you reluctant to forgive. Try a positive approach like:
1. Forgiveness is viewing people as God sees them.
2. Forgiveness is taking the high road.
3. Forgiveness accepts God’s serenity and contentment over righteous anger.
4. Forgiveness is refusing to replay past hurts in your mind.
5. Forgiveness knows anger and resentment are the enemy’s devices to get you off course.
6. Forgiveness is giving your pain to the only wound healer, Jesus.
7. Forgiveness is letting go of resentments and grudges that consumes energy you can better use in positive thinking.
8. Forgiveness is a choice
What is the answer for wounded hearts and unforgiving spirits? “Who” is the difference?” Human nature does not forgive, but Jesus takes our old nature and creates a new way of living, a new way of thinking outside self.
13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
18 Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. 19 You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.